21 Nov 2018

 

“It Will Not Work” Silencing Women South Sudanese

"Those days when you use to be able to win with the “vigana defence” are over...so don’t piss on me and tell me it is raining!"

Nyanyuon Bany
I would bet any outspoken South Sudanese woman has had someone try to shame her into silence by innuendos and insinuation of either dating them, sleeping with them or some idea of bitterness by being “heartbroken.”
These men can’t accept that their ideas are just crap and that one is simply pulling them up on their public records of bad behaviour or utter uselessness at their job. So they bring in the “vagina defence” - attempting to belittle the woman ideas by attacking their moral character - which they know carries a lot of cultural advantage in favour of men.
I have seen all kind of South Sudanese men doing this, even those who will next day talk about equal representation of women, women rights and their wives and daughters.
I saw it with Nyandeng Garang being called Riek Machars wife, have seen one man weaponised the sexual assault of a woman to claim she is only critical of him because she experienced that abuse and was now bitter against all men.
I have seen it used against another woman who broke off an engagement. I have seen it used against me even by men I have never been in any private setting with (I am not sure whether we “ slept” by osmosis).
Whatever the accusation, the idea is all the same: make the woman look emotional, hysterical or even worse make her look like a “slut”, a sharmutha.
Only weak and pathetic men do this. And it will not work anymore. We will continue to speak, debate. We will not give up our voices.
Even if I was Mary Magdalene, and had slept with the whole of Christendom, ain’t none of Jesus (business) to tell me to keep quiet, because a woman is no less of a human because she had a relationship with a man, sexual or otherwise. We don’t think with our private parts but with our brains.
Those days when you use to be able to win with the “vigana defence” are over. Get better ideas instead attempting to humiliate women into silence. I for once will not even feel a slim guilt when men try to pull this. And any decent man will not buy it.
Ps: I am actually a nice person but I am not soft because I am a woman, a wife or mother; so don’t piss on me and tell me it is raining!

Shout out: To all those South Sudanese men who stand by women, who cheer us on, who are not afraid of strong women. We will always need your support. 

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